Pakistani Hell

A man dies and goes to hell. There he finds that there is a different hell for each country. He goes to the German hell and asks, "What do they do here?" He is told,"First they put you in an electric chair for an hour. Then they lay you on a bed of nails for another hour. Then The German devil comes in and whips you for the rest of the day."

The man does not like the sound of that at all, so he moves on.He checks out the USA hell as well as the Russian hell and many more. He discovers that they are all more or less the same as the German hell.

Then he comes to the Pakistani hell and finds that there is a long line of people waiting to get in. Amazed, he asks, "What do they do here?"He is told, "First they put you in an electric chair for an hour. Then they lay you on a bed of nails for another hour. Then the Indian devil comes in and whips you for the rest of the day." "But that is exactly the same as all the other hells - why are there so many people waiting to get in?"Because maintenance is so bad that the electric chair does not work, someone has stolen all the nails from the bed, and the devil is a former Govt servant, so he comes in, signs the register and then goes to the canteen!!!!!!

What Drives a turtle

Ever wonder what 'drives' a turtle?
Don't take your eyes off the shell.....

Guess the answers ...

Scroll down slowly and be honest to yourself.


man 1. ------------
board
















Ans. = man overboard



stand 2. ------------
i













Ans. = I understand

OK?.... Got the drift? Let's try a few now and see how you fair?


3. /r/e/a/d/i/n/g/













Ans. = reading between the lines



4. r road a d











Ans. = cross road


5. cycle cycle cycle














Ans. = tricycle


0 6. ------------ M.D.
Ph.D.















Ans. = two degrees below zero


knee 7. ------------
light













Ans. = neon light (knee-on-light)


ground 8. ---------------
feet feet feet feet feet feet















Ans. = six feet underground








9. he's / himself













Ans. = he's by himself


10. ecnalg














Ans. = backward glance


11. death ..... life


















Ans. = life after death


12. THINK

















Ans. think big !!

And the last one is real fundoo ..

13. ababaaabbbbaaaabbbbababaabbaaabbbb....









Ans. long time no 'C' (see)

Read what happened to Bill Gates after death

Well, Bill," said God, "I'm really confused on this one. I'mnot sure whether to send you to Heaven or Hell! After all, you helped society enormously by putting a computer in almost every home in the world and yet you created that ghastly Windows. I'm going to do something I've never done before. I'm going to let you decide where you want to go!"

Mr. Gates replied, "Well, thanks, Lord. What's the difference between the two?"
God said, "You can take a peek at both places briefly if it will help you decide. Shall we look at Hell first?" "Sure!" said Bill. "Let's go!"

Bill was amazed! He saw a clean, white sandy beach with clear waters. There were thousands of beautiful women running around, playing in the water, laughing and frolicking about. The sun was shining and the temperature was just perfect!

Bill said, "This is great! If this is Hell, I can't wait to see Heaven!"

To which God replied, "Let's go!" and off they went. Bill saw puffy white clouds in a beautiful blue sky with angels drifting about playing harps and singing.

It was nice, but surely not as enticing as Hell. Mr. Gates thought for only a brief moment and rendered his decision.

"God, I do believe I would like to go to Hell."

"As you desire," said God.

Two weeks later, God decided to check up on the late billionaire to see how things were going. He found Bill shackled to a wall, screaming among the hot flames in a dark cave. He was being burned and tortured by demons.

"How ya doin', Bill?" asked God. Bill responded with anguish and despair.

"This is awful! This is not what I expected at all! What happened to the beach and the beautiful women playing in the water?"

"Oh, THAT!" said God. "That was the screen saver"